Seasons of Singleness

I know how hard it can be. It seems as though everyone around you is in a relationship or getting married and you wish more than anything that you were too. I was there a couple years ago. I wanted somebody who I could spend time with, talk to about my day, and laugh and smile with. I wanted to love someone and have them love me back. The hopefulness of having that person kind of consumed my life. I would think about it all the time and compare my life to people who had a special someone in theirs. It was like that for a while, and then I decided that I was going to change my attitude towards love. Instead of chasing after it and wishing for it every second of the day, I was going to wait for it to come to me. You always hear the saying, “Love finds you when you least expect it.” In that moment I really hoped that was true. I started to focus on myself, my health, my relationships with the other special people in my life (like my family and my best friends), and my faith and relationship with God. I got to the point where I was happy and content with not having a boy in my life, and I stopped worrying about finding one. About a year later, when I least expected it, the love that I hoped every day for found me. I’m not saying that this same thing will happen to you. You may not find your perfect person as soon as you stop looking, and the first relationship you have after your time of singleness might not be the one that will last forever, but I think that if you do these things during your time of singleness, it will be a lot easier and other parts of your life will become so much better.

Focus on other relationships. Take your time as a single woman to work on the other relationships in your life. Spending time with your friends and family will most importantly grow your relationships with them, but it will also keep your mind off being single. You will enjoy yourself and will hopefully realize that you don’t need a boyfriend to be happy and have fun, and you will realized how loved you already are.

Grow in your faith. Take this time to focus on the most important relationship in your life, the one with God. Read the Bible, go to church, and spend time with other believers. Talk to Him about your struggles and pray for your future boyfriend/husband. Join a small group with other women. It will give you a new community of friends who you can talk to and grow with. Growing in your faith will give you so much more joy and happiness.

Work on yourself. Take the time you have by yourself to really focus on what you want to do in life. Work hard in school or at your job, take care of your body and live a healthy lifestyle. This is a great time to start new things and become the you you’ve always wanted to be. If you want to read more, now is a great time to do that. If you want to start a fitness regimen, now is a great time to do it. Work on being the best version of yourself and do the things that make you happy.

Remember, God won’t put the perfect person into your life until you are both ready. Take your season of singleness as time to work on your life- making it what you want it to be and making it ready to share with another person- and making yourself the person you want to be, and the person who your future partner will need you to be. I hope that this advice helps you, but always remember to love yourself and your life no matter what. You don’t need a boyfriend to be happy or to be loved. You are loved by yourself, your family, your friends, and the God who created you. Make those relationships right before you add another one into your life. Thanks for reading!